Tuesday, March 13, 2012

The Cupcake Wars

No not the show that is on the Food Channel where bakeries compete to bake the best cupcakes for a cash prize.  Though for some torturous reason I love watching that show...but my personal war against cupcakes. 

My day starts with getting up just in time to take a quick shower, jump into my clothes, throw my oatmeal and Kashi bar in my bag and head to the looby and jump in a cab.  For some reason even though I remember the "Wake up call" my body had other ideas like getting more sleep.  I ran into work with 5 minutes to spare...YEAH..Breakfast was being delivered and it was the eggs, bacon, sausage, and just to spice things up they had mini quiches too.  I opt for my Oat Revolution Oatmeal and fruit.  I blogged earlier about the doubt that creeping up in my mind..well my will was tested when about an hour later they delivered cupcakes to a co-worker behind me to celebrate her birthday.  Why did she have to be sitting behind me because I could smell the yummy cake and frosting as it wafted in the air.  I looked at those beautifully decorated cupcakes in their silvery wrappers and all I could think is how deceptive a package those little cupcakes can be to some one.  They appear so small and harmless.  They are easy to rationalize because they only take a couple of bites to eat...How many calories could really be contained in those decorative wrappers.  So you eat one and then two and then before you know it you have eaten the equivalent of a couple of slices of cake.  For me they are my "gateway drug"  and I think this in my head..knowing that one bite and before I will know it I will be eating my way through enough calories for a week and the mental set back would be even more devasting because I would be beating myself up.   So I formed a mental "Cupcake Resistance" and the part of me that has no self doubt that I can do this took over and formed a the wall that made those cupcakes less appealing.  I was going along just fine when Lunch was delivered...OMG Mexican food from a local restaurant that is supposed to have fabulous mexican food.  The spread included Burritos (chicken or beef), black beans, refried beans smothered in cheese, rice, and chips and guacamole.  So my cupcake resistance called in reinforcements and I grabbed my Kashi bar quickly and began eating feeding my body and giving me energy.  When I felt myself being tempted, I headed outside to get some fresh air and walk around the block in hopes that when I got back to the CC the food would be gone and I would be refreshed and rejuvenated. 

When I got back I got some fruit to satisfy the sweet side of my brain and went back to work..there was left over but looking at the congealed cheese it was easier to resist.  I counted down the hours until my shift would be over.  About 10 minutes before I was scheduled to leave, they delivered dinner which was Beef Brisket, Mashed Potatoes with Gravy, and rolls.  I was glad that I was leaving because I do not know if the resistance could have held out much longer and I may have loaded my plate with Mashed Potatoes and covered them in Gravy.  I went back to the hotel and had an Orange and then had one of the two Weigth Watcher meals I had left in my freezer and the hotel.  I only have one more night in the hotel so unless I want to waste the meals I have to have them. 

I am proud of myself, I have resisted so many temptations over these 2 weeks.  Food that 5 months ago, I would have over indulged and not felt good about after it was all said and done. I have foudn that inner strength that I find amazing....

I made it a fitness goal to play in the Parents versus Players game that C's soccer team plays every season.  In the past I have found this task overwhelming and felt like I was going to pass out after about 5 minutes of running on that field.  I usally played defense since that allowed me to just stay in a small area.  I wanted to play the game this time and try out my new me, sadly the game is being played tomorrow during practice and I won't be there.  It makes me sad.  I hate missing things!!! I have to think positive though and remember I will be there for the last 2 games and the end of the season festival and party.  I have two more shifts and then I will be flyign home!!  I leave late Thursday night and I am taking the red eye home.  I will get in to town Friday morning after F and C have left for school and work.  I am planning on taking C out of school early as a surprise so we can spend some time together.  I got her a hair appointment so she can look super cute for her soccer pictures. 

On my to do list while I am home....includes finding a yoga class and finding the time to go, spending time with my family and rejuvenating my body and soul. 


Thanks to everyone for the love and support and a place where I can share my trials and successes....

Talk to you later,..

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